The Witness Within
Today I had a metaphysical session with Dr. Dylan Rumley who has been assisting me to find the source and trigger for my anxiety and panic attacks. I was referred to her by Shaman Jon Rasmussen. I reached out to Shaman Jon as a result of working here in Orlando with Dr. Romie Mushtaq. All of these brilliant and gifted people have helped me tremendously.
What Dylan discovered in today's session was, among many things, that there was something that was said or something that happened during my actual cardiac surgery procedure that my subconscious mind and cellular memory had stored and has proven to be unsettling. Although I was under anesthesia, my mind, brain, body, and all it's sensory functions remained fully operative, as they should. I was just not aware of what was being perceived.
Apparently, what the subconscious had witnessed was disturbing enough to spark the use of anxiety and panic as a way to get my attention. This is the subconscious mind's way of saying "you gave up your control of your body to someone else and they didn't handle it properly." They did not treat you with the respect and honour that they should've. Somewhere along the way, I had become body inventory and the fact that I was a human being with a life, family, hopes, and dreams had somehow become irrelevant.
Not all the hospital staff were involved in this but it was enough to trigger my subconscious to lead a revolt into my conscious awareness to get my attention. And so it did. Looking back on my experience, after the surgery I spent 15 days in ICU in excruciating pain around the clock. Morphene, Oxycodone, and multiple other pain killers might as well have been M&M's. I can remember looking at the nurses station with my eyes begging for some type of relief. They had no answers for me.
Little did I know that months later, the anxiety and panic symptoms that would manifest would be so bad, that it would make me rather have the surgical pain. I write this article as a warning to you. Do not give up control of your physical body to anyone without being absolutely sure of what is being done, by who, and whether or not it is needed. Your body and your subconscious mind will remember things your conscious mind cannot know. Listen to the voice within ... the Witness to all that you experience. Then, and only then can you make a wise decision.
Just a thought ...
~Justin Taylor, ORDM., OCP., DM.
